When Things Get Under Our Skin
March 21, 2024
If we have thick skin, we are protected from outer impacts more than thin-skinned people. But for the thick-skinned, it's harder to release infection because boils, cysts, or pimples cannot easily reach the surface.
When any pocket of infection exists, whether large or small, it is harmful for it to stay there. The cyst or boil can rupture beneath the skin and spread disease. Plus, many boils under the skin can be painful.
Like boils and cysts in the body, we sometimes carry purulent emotions under our skin. We may pride ourselves on being thick-skinned and unflappable. But keeping too much under our thick skin is not wise. When people hurt our feelings, betray or abuse us, or people we love, we may think our hard shell protects us. However, such hurts have a way of bypassing the skin and going straight to our hearts, where they fester even though we are not consciously aware of it.
Fortunately, a thick-skinned person can release the emotional poison under their skin. But paradoxically, they do this not by asserting their strength but by admitting their hurt. Not everyone is in touch with their hurts. I knew a tough guy known for being an aggressive attorney and running roughshod over his opposition. He was tough; nothing seemed to phase him; the more people talked of his raging insensitivity to others, the more he appeared to like it. He had such a reputation for being a strong, arrogant attorney that everyone wanted to hire him.
As he aged, this person became less aggressive. Something had pierced his thick skin. Could it have been the love of his grandchildren, the devotion of his wife and children? He developed some health problems and talked more freely about his feelings. Finally, unafraid of his vulnerability, he was able to freely weep. His health problems required around-the-clock assistance, so he had to become as vulnerable as a baby.
Many people would have labeled this dear soul as an Enneagram Type Eight. But only the person themselves knows the intentions behind their behavior and attitudes. As for me, I feel he was an exceedingly strong person, who, whether an Eight or not, learned the ability to release that only spiritual vulnerability can afford us.
He was my dear friend.
Inquiry: Is yours' a thick or a thin skin? How can you tell?
Dear God,
You gave me a friend who taught me how to surrender our most important defense. I am forever grateful for the privilege of knowing and experiencing this dear man and how he triumphed over his impregnable strength with powerful weakness.
Amen.
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