Application Part 2
December 30, 2024
Application Part 2
Our most important project here on earth is to bring our soul to its wholeness. And we do that by growing in consciousness. The more we are aware of ourselves, the world, and the truth, the more we apply that awareness to our concerns, circumstances, and relationships. So, our soul reaches wholeness through the application of consciousness.
Because of consciousness studies and the Enneagram, I’ve become acutely aware of my failures to apply my beliefs to my daily life. Frequently, I fail to give myself compassion or take responsibility for my failures. I am often unaware of my passion of fear and how it completely controls me if I do not check it. I am often unaware of all the passions within me and how they, too, can hijack my peace and serenity. Anger, pride, deceit, envy, greed, over-indulgence, lust, and slothfulness often overtake me. When they do, if I am fortunate, I become conscious of it. Sometimes it’s too late. Other times, I can save the situation or at least make amends to myself or others.
If we are not operating from our soul’s consciousness, we operate from our ego. The other day, I lost my keys at the gym and couldn’t find them anywhere. In a time crunch, and under stress that day, I needed my keys to drive my car. My ego took charge and hatched an idea that someone took my keys by mistake but would return them to the gym only at their leisure, which may be next week! Then, my ego thickened the plot. “What if they took the keys on purpose? After all, there are such people,” I thought.
The ego makes up stories that fit its fears and desires. In this case, I feared someone would take something I needed. Then, the disintegration process continued, which included projection and blame.
A young man helped me scour the entire recreation center but to no avail. He said, “Don’t worry, you will find them.” His voice interrupted my ego chatter. His was the voice of truth. And it touched something inside me. It awakened me. It was hopeful; the antidote to fear. Then, I stopped and looked at the situation from a bird’s eye view. Regardless of how my ego catastrophized the lost keys, I was OK. I could always get more keys. My mind calmed down, and I recalled that I had a detection device on my keys and by using it, found that the keys were in the building. I finally found them. They had dropped from my pocket into the mechanism of one of the weight machines I used.
My stress level did not allow me to think rationally—my self-protective ego was too busy playing “Ain’t it awful?” to calm down. But thanks to a voice of consciousness and hope, I finally did see what my ego chatter was doing to me. I look back over a lifetime and recall that many, many times, I did not ever see what the chatter was doing to me.
Spiritual practice: Who are your voices of truth that touch you when you are immersed in your ego?
Self-inquiry: Is it possible to use your voices of truth even more often?
Dear God,
Grant me the gift of recognizing my ego chatter and how to listen to the voice of truth instead. Amen
