Going Deeper Part 6
November 27, 2024
Going Deeper Part 6
When conscious, we reject the idea of stewing in the juice of self-pity or anger. In consciousness, the ego cannot diminish our self-esteem. Instead, we go down into the depths of our being to discover our amazing soul qualities. The qualities of self-compassion, trust, strength, mercy, goodness, hope, and power, to name a few, lift our awareness and redirect our energy into furthering our purpose. Realizing our essential goodness is beautiful because we're reminded that we are of value and that even though we are disappointed in someone or ourselves, we are worthy.
Sometimes we cannot go into our depths to embrace our soul qualities by ourselves. It takes a trusted person to lead us there and hold our preciousness for us until we can claim it and embody it for ourselves. I had a professor once, who was compassionate with me when I failed to meet the standards of the program. I was terribly disappointed in myself. Some days during this dark period, I found it hard to put one foot in front of the other. I was forced to pick myself up by my bootstraps and find meaning and self-compassion just to get through. But I couldn’t fully believe in myself again.
Happily though, even though my failures were obvious, instead of kicking me to the curb, my program chairman believed in me. He said, “Joe all is not lost — you are salvageable.” His words gave me just the hope I needed until I could believe in myself again.
But soul qualities such as those described above provide even more; they open us to the fact that abundant life will compensate for our unmet expectations. Once we know that life flows through us abundantly, we can receive all it brings. The abundant flow of the Divine doesn't necessarily give us what our ego wills for us. Instead, it gives us healing, joy, and many other spiritual gifts that we would never have realized but for the shift to consciousness. We no longer have to dwell in disappointment in others or self-repudiation.
Someone lifting us up and showing us our worth at our depths is a blessing. Another way to our depths is through prayer, where we meet the God of total acceptance. Feeling compassion from the author of compassion is the most extraordinary direct experience I know of for healing and restoring wholeness through returning us to our souls. There is also meditation and the connection to our soul child.
Spiritual practice: Picture yourself as a young child. Who do you see? Can you crawl into that little body and re-inhabit the innocence and pure love you were born with? What qualities does that child have that are still deep within you? Name those qualities. Are these qualities greater than your resentments? Can these qualities heal your resentments?
Spiritual inquiry: In your disappointments in others, what role does your ego play in perpetuating that disappointment? In being disappointed in yourself, what role does your ego play in perpetuating self-resentment?
Dear God,
Your love fills in all gaps left by anyone who may disappoint me. Love fills in the gaps left in me when I fail myself. I am truly thankful for that compassion and the healing it gives. Amen
