Divine Order 7
January 27, 2025
Divine Order Part 7
Many may not realize that divine order includes our being loved as well as our loving others. Yes, being loved is a basic human need, and we are totally out of divine order when and if we are not loved. Decades ago, child developmental psychologists Spitz and Bowlby, among others, observed the behaviors of children and babies in particular. Their observations revealed that babies who were not nurtured or loved, and who formed no physical attachment with a caretaker frequently went into what is known as anaclitic depression, which if not treated, leads to Failure to Thrive Syndrome, and death.
How is this possible? Aren't we biological entities created with enormous energies and endurance? Yes, however, these studies revealed that regardless of our hard wiring, things go out of order if we are not loved. Why? Because we are not physical beings only. We are far more than that.
My friend and mentor Henri Nouwen wrote an excellent book called Life of the Beloved, in which he explained to his Jewish friend, Fred, what the spiritual life is like in the Christian tradition. Henri's point, which his life indeed showed, is that we are God's beloved regardless of what life hands us, irrespective of the rejections we experience or failures we accumulate. As such, we are recipients of our Creator's tender and personal care and affection.
Henri speaks of how God's personal care and affection for us reach far beyond physical needs to emotional (heart-centered) and soul needs. We get to feel our belovedness not only from time alone with God and from the experiences God provides, but also directly from others who are our "caretakers."
If we do not care for someone and are not cared for by another, we are not fully in the flow of divine order. Divine order includes receiving and giving. I recall one of my gloomiest times, was when I was alone in graduate school. Far away from home, I had no one to love. As a result, I felt sad, withdrew from social occasions, and began to question my existence. Finally in the dining hall, I sat next to some people who I would invite into my life and eventually love. My heart was lifted because of a small community of dear souls who seemed to come from nowhere. They were an answer to my prayer. These dear souls restored my feeling of being beloved.
Spiritual practice: List the ways you feel beloved.
Self-inquiry: Is there someone who is your caretaker? How do you feel beloved?
Dear God,
Grant that I always feel my belovedness. I pray to be led to anyone who you may use me to show them their belovedness. In Your name, Amen
